Remember Me
by I Miss Birdie
Summary: It's John's first birthday but someone is missing from his life. Things are different and everyone gets together to remember what happened the day John entered into the world. Contains mention of death. This is a One-Shot.


Remember Me

One-shot

Ricky walked downstairs into his room. He walked over to a white crib and peered down at the little boy sleeping there. He leaned in and rubbed his back.

"Hey, buddy, time to get up." He stirred. "It's your birthday today. Happy birthday, John!" John sat up and blinked a few times before standing up with a smile. "How was your nap? Did you sleep good?" John nodded and Ricky picked him up. He walked over to a small changing table and laid John down. "Gotta change your diaper so your nice and clean for the party." he threw the old diaper away in the garbage can. After putting a clean diaper on Ricky picked John back up and walked over to a framed picture.

"Say hi, John" Ricky said pointing at the picture.

John waved. "Hi." Ricky turned and walked up the stairs to where everyone was waiting for the now one year old John.

As Ricky turned the corner into the kitchen he almost ran into Ashley Juergens.

"Oh, hey! Happy birthday, John!" She leaned in and kissed him. "How's my favorite nephew?"

"He's doing good. He can say a few words, and he's walking great." Ashley's smile faded.

"She would have been so proud of him." Ricky nodded.

"Yeah, she would have. He sees her picture everyday, and I always tell him about her." He paused and set John down so he could go see his grandparents. "You know, Ashley, you guys are more than welcome to come visit him whenever you want."

"Thanks, Ricky, your doing great with him. He's beautiful."

"He gets it from his mother." Ashley sighed and whipped at the corner of her eye.

"I miss her so much. It was really hard knowing this day was coming. It's happy and sad." Ricky understood what she meant.

This past year had been full of highs and lows. Balancing the life of a father, a full time student, and a part time job. A year ago today reality really hit hard.

_***Flashback***_

_Ricky was in his room putting outlet covers in the outlets to help "baby proof" his room when his cell phone rang. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and saw that it was Amy. He quickly answered._

"_Hey, Ricky, it's me Amy. I just wanted to tell you that I'm at the hospital. I didn't know if someone had called you." His eyes lit up._

"_No. Why are you at the hospital? Is everything okay?"_

"_Everything's fine. The baby's coming."_

"_Oh my god, now!?" He said quickly._

"_Yeah, I thought maybe you'd wanna be here."_

"_You did?" Ricky was shocked, happy, and excited all at the same time. "I mean I didn't know if you wanted me to be there or not. We never really talked about it."_

"_Well, I think you should be here. He's your son."_

"_Okay, well I'll get there as soon as I can." With that he hung up the phone and left._

_***End Flashback***_

Ricky shook his head and decided now wasn't the time to sit and remember what could have been. He walked over to where John was.

"Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Juergens." Ricky said to John's grandparents. "How have you both been doing?" They both smiled down at John who had run over to his dad. Ricky picked him up and smiled.

"We've been okay. Still working on a few things." Anne said as she looked at her grandson, the boy who looked so much like his mother. "Your doing a wonderful job with him, Ricky. He's getting so big. Amy would have loved him so much." They all stood silent for a few minutes. John broke the silence.

"Mama!" He pointed towards the entry to the stairs that lead to Ricky's room. "Mama!"

Anne and George looked at Ricky, both puzzled. "What?" George said.

Ricky looked at John. "That's right, buddy. Mama's that way." He looked at George and Anne. "He's talking about the picture I have in our room. We walk by it every time we go up or down the stairs and I always tell him to say hi to mama." Anne felt tears forming and she quickly grabbed a napkin off the table.

"Oh, Ricky. That means a lot to me." He shrugged.

"I want him to know who his mother was. She was a wonderful girl and would have done anything for him." They all nodded.

"Come one. Let's enjoy this day!" Margret said as she walked into the kitchen. "It's John's birthday and everything is all set up in the living room."

"Yeah," Ricky started. "You're right. Hey John," he said looking at the boy in his arms. "Let's go open presents!" They all followed Margret into the living room to celebrate with the excited boy.

***6 hours later***

"Alright buddy. Time to get you ready for bed. It's been a long day." Ricky said after closing the front door. The Juergens had just left saying they planned on visiting more often. Ricky walked with John down to their room and went straight to the changing table to put John's pjs on.

When he had finished changing him, he picked him up and set him on the floor. "Why don't you play with your toys for a few minutes while daddy goes and gets your bottle." John walked over to his toys and sat down. Ricky ran up the stairs and turned the corner into the kitchen where Margret was holding a bottle she had gotten ready for John.

"Oh, thanks a bunch Margret." Ricky took the bottle and went to head back downstairs.

"Ricky," he stopped. "I'm very proud of you. You've worked very hard this past year."

"Thanks, Margret. You've been a big help too." With that said he took off to go get John into bed. "Alright, buddy. Time for bed." John jumped up and ran over to his dad. Ricky picked him up and walked to his crib. "Give daddy a kiss." John puckered up and gave him a kiss. "Night John." Ricky laid John in his crib and covered him up with his blanket. He handed him his bottle and walked over to the nightlight to turn it on. Before he walked up the stairs he looked back at the crib. "I love you, John." He walked up the stairs and into the kitchen to find all the lights off and the stove light on. His foster parents had gone to bed.

He walked over to the kitchen table and pulled out a chair. After sitting down he put his elbows up on the table and rested his head in his hands. He sighed. "You were supposed to be here for him. You were supposed to help me. Why? Why did you leave us?" In the light of the stove light glistened a single tear that slid down Ricky's cheek.

_***Flashback***_

_Ricky sat in the waiting room as he waited to hear some information on how Amy was doing. Her father, George Juergens had just come out of her room to tell everyone that it would just be a little bit longer. _

_Ben walked over and sat down next to Ricky. _

"_I just saw Amy. I hate to hear her in pain, it's killing me." Ben said._

"_I just feel so damn guilty. I can't believe I did this."_

"_Yea, well you did do this, but it is what it is. And, who knows why but maybe it was just meant to happen. Although I don't think it's meant to happen again." Ricky smiled._

"_Yea, believe me its not gonna happen again. I'm thinking about getting fixed." Ben laughed. "I mean it, the state should make me get a vasectomy or something."_

"_Ricky, your sixteen, your in high school. I mean maybe one day you'd like to grow up and get married and have some more children."_

"_I don't think so. This is it for me. I don't even deserve to have this one." Ricky chocked back the tears he felt rising. He held back the emotion that would show his weakness. "I don't deserve to have a baby with a girl this nice. With Amy. I can't believe I did something so stupid. It's changed the lives of so many people. I hate myself."_

"_Hey, you can't enter into the world of father hood with that kind of attitude. Your son's gonna need you."_

"_Why he'll have you." He said in a resentful tone. "And Amy and her family."_

"_You're his family Ricky. You're his father."_

"_Whoever raises the child is his father and I don't know…I don't know if I can do it. Or if I should do it. Maybe I should leave now before I mess up anything."_

"_Your not gonna walk away from this. If you were gonna walk away from this you would have walked long before now."_

"_How does this work? How do I act like a father when your Amy's boyfriend." Just as Ben was getting ready to respond to Ricky's question an alarm went off and someone came on over the overhead speaker._

"_Dr. Karen to Juergens room 319. Dr. Karen to Juergens room 319." _

_Ricky and Ben jumped up and ran over to the nurse's station._

"_What's going on in room 319?" Ben said. He arrived first at the desk._

"_There was a slight complication and the doctor is on her way to check on Amy. Everything is going to be okay. Please just go sit back down and wait." Both guys turned around and at that moment the nurse burst through Amy's door pulling Amy on her bed. They were heading down the hall._

"_Amy?" Ben said as he ran after her. Ricky followed._

"_Ben?" Amy said in desperation. "Ben, something's wrong with the baby." Ben reached Amy and walked next to her bed holding her hand. "I have to have an emergency c-section." Tears were running down her cheeks and Ben could see the fear in her eyes._

"_Amy, it's going to be okay. They doctor will take good care of you and the baby." He squeezed her hand. "I'll be here when you wake up. I love you, Amy." He had to let go of her hand as they pushed through a set of doors that said 'ER'._

"_I love you, too Ben." The doors closed and Ben stood there starring. Ricky stood behind him silently._

"_She's gonna be fine. Let's just go sit and wait. They'll come get us." They both walked back to the waiting room and sat down. Neither saying anything to the other._

_A few minutes passed and George came out to tell them that there was a healthy baby boy. _

"_A son. I have a son." Ricky said with a smile._

"_How's Amy? How's she doing?" Ben rambled out._

"_She's unconscious and they're working on waking her up. She lost a lot of blood." He started to cry as he talked about his eldest daughter. "She's not doing good." He couldn't say anymore. He just turned and walked back down the hallway._

_Ben dropped down into his chair and sat there dumbfounded. Ricky looked down at him and didn't know what to say._

"_I'm sure she'll be fine. I hope she'll be fine." He more so told himself then Ben. _

_Minutes passed before they received another update and it wasn't the one they wanted to hear. This time it was Amy's mother, Anne, who delivered the message. Her face was red and her eyes puffy. She was crying. Ben and Ricky jumped out of their chairs and ran up to meet Anne. She threw her arms around both of them and sobbed._

"_She's gone! My baby is gone!" Her screams were painful to everyone in the room. Even those who didn't know the family. "Oh my god…..my baby is goooneee!!" Ricky felt the emotion well up in his body and the tears threatening to fall yet again. Except this time he refused to hold them back. Ben was frozen. He stood there with Anne draped over him expressionless. That's when it hit. His eyes swelled up and tears flowed freely down his face._

'_Amy….' he thought to himself. 'Amy's gone? No, it can't be. There's gotta be some mistake.' But would Anne make a mistake like that. No, no she wouldn't. It was true. Amy had died during child birth. She was gone._

_***3 hours later***_

_After hours of waiting. Everything was starting to calm down. Ricky had taken Ben outside so that they could both calm down. George had taken Anne to the waiting room and there they both consoled each other. Ashley, struck with grief had sat in a corner by herself and just cried._

_After Ricky had come back into the waiting room he sat down and did the only thing he could think of, wait. It was about fifteen minutes past one in the morning when a nurse came out and asked for the father of the baby Amy had given birth too._

"_That's me." He said. 'What do they need me for?' He walked over to the nurse. "I'm Ricky, Ricky Underwood. I'm the father." She smiled._

"_Would you like to meet your son, Mr. Underwood." He nodded and followed her to the nursery._

_When they entered they walked over to a small plastic bin. A tiny baby boy wrapped in a blue blanket with a blue hat on was sucking on his fingers. _

"_That's your son. You can hold him if you want." Ricky nodded and the nurse carefully picked up the baby and handed him to Ricky._

"_Hi," he said softly. 'What do you say to a baby? What is his name? Did Amy name him before….before she died?' Ricky looked at the nurse. "Did she name him?" He asked. The nurse nodded._

"_Yes, she did. His name is John." The nurse touched his shoulder. "I'm very sorry for your loss. You can stay with him as long as you'd like." She walked away to take care of another baby that had started crying._

"_John, huh?" He looked at his son. "John…I like that. What do you think?" John made a few grunting noises and looked up at his father. "Hey, John. I'm your daddy." Ricky felt a tear slip out. "Your mommy would have loved you so much."_

_***2 days later***_

"_We're going home today John." Ricky said picking up his son. "You get to come home with daddy."_

_Everyone had agreed that it would be best for Ricky to take John. As much as the Juergens didn't want to give up their grandson, they knew that after loosing Amy they wouldn't be able to care for the little baby. Ricky had spoken to his foster mother, Margret and she agreed that John would be better off with his father and said she would do as much as she could to help._

_***End Flashback***_

"Hey, Amy." Ricky said still sitting in the chair at the kitchen table. "Thank you so much for giving me such a wonderful gift. I wouldn't trade him for the world." He sighed. "I wish you could have seen him, hold him, be with him. He needs you, Amy."

Ricky stood up and walked over to the stove. He reached up and pushed the button to shut the light off. He walked over to the stairs and down to his room. Before going to bed he stopped off at John's crib and leaned over. He gently touched his back and smiled. "I love you, John. I love you so much." He straightened up. "Good night, John, sleep good." Ricky walked away from the crib and over to the nightlight. He leaned over and shut it off before going over to his bed. He sat down on the edge and just looked over at his sleeping son. "I miss you, Amy." He laid down and attempted to fall asleep.

"_Take good care of him, Ricky." It was a whisper that no one could hear but the person who said it. It was light like the wind and blew through the room. John peeked open an eye and smiled. He could feel the presence of his mother and that's what comforted him. He fell back asleep with a smile on his little face knowing that his mother was watching over him._

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_Well that's it. Please leave a review and tell me what you think. It was just an idea I got in my head after I listened to the song "Don't Take the Girl", the part where the woman has complications during child birth. So leave a review PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks for reading!!!!!!!!!11_


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